Daily Fantasy Gluttony: Thanksgiving Special

Editor’s Note: In light of the major FanDuel Thanksgiving Day contests, GiantBallOfOil has released a special feature article geared towards the NFL’s three-game Thursday slate. Enjoy!

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Everyone knows the prevailing sentiment of Thanksgiving. In fact, they put it right there in the name, to make it idiot-proof: Give Thanks. One might surmise that us weekly fantasy guys should be thankful this week: For the guys who have pulled through for us already, for the disasters averted at the last minute, and frankly for the right to play daily fantasy at all. One might surmise that, but one would be wrong!

Thanksgiving is about gluttony. More of something? More of everything! Many in the world struggle to find food, yet on this holiday, we cook and eat so much that it goes from pleasurable to painful. We literally eat ourselves out of the top button on our pants. More, more, more! For this three-game slate, we aren’t here to give thanks. To quote The Gambler, Kenny Rogers, “There will be time for thankin’, when the fantasy season is done.”

Fortunately, FanDuel is here to help us out with our fantasy gluttony. They have a split slate this week, which means you have two opportunities to rake in those fantasy winnings like so many pumpkin pie slices. You’ve simply got to bang out the perfect lineup and get it entered. Just remember, when you think you have submitted enough entries to make the profit you want, enter one more. Then, take a nap. It is the Thanksgiving way.

Mark Sanchez at DAL – $7,600 – With the six signal callers available on the T-Day slate, it’s basically two excellent matchups, three garbage matchups, and one in the middle. One of the excellent options is Matthew Stafford, who throws for three touchdowns like I go to the gym: you think it happens somewhat frequently, but when you look back, it hasn’t happened all year. That leaves Tony Romo versus the Eagles, with the other make-you-drool matchup, and Mark Sanchez as the so-so matchup opposing him. I go Sanchez, if nothing else, for the $1,100 in price savings you’ll need later.

LeSean McCoy at DAL – $8,000 – Four of the six squads taking the gridiron Thursday have a bell-cow back, and three of them have a back-up of no discernible fantasy value. That limits options. McCoy is the cheapest of those four stud backs, and his matchup is on par with any of them. When you mix in that he allegedly whispers “McCoy” to you as he breaks your ankles, he’s basically telling you who to play!

Carlos Hyde v SEA – $4,900 – Like the third down where Randall Cunningham uncorked a 91-yarder, Hyde is an opportune punt play. Of all the “backups,” he’s getting the greatest share of carries (one-third last week), and his upside is greater than that too, with Frank Gore limited in practice. Even with limited touches, it would surprise no one if Hyde carried the pigskin to pay dirt this week.

Dez Bryant

Dez Bryant v PHI – $8,800 – With, by far, the highest over-under this week, Vegas expects this game to be high scoring. Of course the Cowboys will be in a shootout. And to acquiesce, the Eagles give out receiving touchdowns like soup kitchens give out meals on Thanksgiving, and Dez is just that jerk who goes through the line two or three times.

Jordan Matthews at DAL – $7,600 – It’s like when you let your cousins go through first, and they go for the turkey legs. Fools! You get white meat and don’t have to wait in line. Win-win. Matthews is the Eagles’ more productive wideout with Sanchez at the helm. Your cousins would probably pay for Jeremy Maclin too. Fools!

Calvin Johnson v CHI – $8,600 – Like the top button of your Levis after your third helping, Johnson is getting ready to pop. At home on the fast track, a week healthier, and thrilled to line up against a guy who doesn’t have “Patterson”, “Cromartie”, “Revis”, or “Browner” on the back of his jersey, Megatron is going to feast this week.

Brent Celek at DAL – $4,700 – Just as a point of reference, the Eagles tight end who is on the field twice as often over the last couple weeks is $100 cheaper on FanDuel. This is such an obvious play, that I think I’ll just touch on something else here instead. They can all those veggies that you put in your Thanksgiving hot-dishes in the same factories, so don’t feel the need to pay for the name brand. You’re literally paying for the sheet of paper on the outside. Don’t pay for paper, and don’t pay for Zach Ertz.

Robbie Gould at DET – $4,500 – A kicker, in a dome.

Detroit Lions v CHI – $5,200Jay Cutler: throwing interceptions and not appearing to care about it since 2006.

About the Author

GiantBallofOil
Luke Louison (GiantBallofOil)

Luke “GiantBallofOil” Louison is a microstakes daily fantasy player and integral member of Team KillaB2482 (Ranked #2 in NFL, #13 Overall). You can follow Luke on Twitter @GiantBallofOil

“You know Darren, if you would have told me twenty-five years ago that some day I’d be standing here about to solve the world’s energy problems, I would’ve said you’re crazy… Now let’s push this giant ball of oil out the window.”