A Duck for All Seasons: A Championship for the Rest of Us
Yes, it’s true. You didn’t make it to that championship final you so expected yourself to make. It is a harsh reality, one that stings a bit, but let’s be honest: if you’re not one of the DFS one-percenters who can afford to multi-entry the big-bucks-low-number-of-entries tournaments, your odds of making it to Vegas or Atlantis or the Playboy Mansion are slim, if not near impossible. You need to face reality and accept that the bigger the industry grows, the harder it will be to make a major.
That being said, you can have your own bit of fun while the DFS elite gallivant on jet skis next to dolphins or open humungous gift baskets in their hotel rooms or whatever. So, for this weekend, let’s celebrate our own good fortune. Let’s have a DFS Championship for the rest of us. Let’s call it the Common DFS Player Championships.
I am going to let you, my faithful readers, decide the tournament format – price, number of entries, everything. We can schedule it for December 14th. I’m sure that our friends at RotoGrinders would be happy to throw in a shirt and cap. I’ll even try to obtain a really horrible trophy. This will be a tournament for the rest of us; those who don’t have the luxury of deciding whether to get the couples massage or go hang gliding over an extinct volcano. In fact, we don’t need the high rollers in this tournament. Forget ‘em. This is for the nickel-and-dimers, the real grinders.
Wow, I feel like I’m having my own Norma Rae moment.
And, sponsors – if there’s a cheap beer or a loud clothing company or a greasy spoon out there looking to market to a very specific clientele, we welcome you with open arms. Feel free to drop a line.
But if we do this, I need your commitment. It can’t be like the Tournament of Shame, where plenty of you praise the idea and then make me sweat like a Baptist preacher on Sunday trying to fill the damn thing. You need to be committed. If I don’t see support quickly, I can find other things to do. I can take up a weird hobby, for example. I know it’s shocking, but I have a life outside of the TOS. Yeah, not much of one, but it is a life.
AS FOR THE TOURNAMENT OF SHAME
Yes, I took the bullet this week, and that bullet has Ryan Tannehill’s name on it. Putting together a lineup that suggests that my Saturday night dinner was laced with peyote, I finished in last place and will be creating a commercial for DraftKings. Speaking of which, if you’re a film student or editor in Los Angeles who wants to help me make this ad, it would be much better than me filming it on my phone without graphics. I can’t pay you, but it will be fun. Okay, maybe I’ll pick up lunch.
Also, please feel free to peruse our brand-new Hall of Shame, which shows not only the people who have participated by performing their shames, but also the people who have flaked and deserve hearing it from you guys. The guys at RG have been really supportive of the tourney, and I am grateful for all of the work they’ve put in to make this possible. Thank you.
I should have a new tournament for this weekend up in a couple days, and I’ll drop it into the Main Forum when I do. And while you’re waiting, here’s a video with a bunch of kittens meeting a guinea pig. Oh, come on, you know you’re going to watch.